“A winner never quits, and a quitter never wins.” – Vince Lombardi 

There are some who say winning is not everything. To that, I say wrong. I ask you, dear reader, what is life without victory—without valor? You may seek an answer all you like, but eventually, you shall conclude that there is no good without the euphoric rush of being a true champion. 

Last year, I covered the events of Clash of Clashes, a high school-wide event involving friendly competition between grades. With the coming of a new March, so comes the long-awaited sequel, covering big risks, high rewards, upsetting defeats, and momentous victories. 

Event 1: Puzzle Puzzle

“Early bird gets the worm” – William Camden

Earlier this year, one might recall migrating to their inbox only to be met with cryptic messaging from the mysterious account, “[email protected].” Sending the upper school populace vague and mildly unsettling emails, the Puzzle Puzzle challenge began antics far earlier than anyone predicted. Turning the entire campus into an escape room, Head of the Arts Department, Andrew Geha, created a game worth playing—worth winning. Teamed into advisories, grades went head to head to decrypt codes, crack locks, and solve riddles for the chance at Clash of Classes points, and in the end, it was the Junior advisory of Baldwin’s to take home the first win of the division-wide event.

I asked Baldwin’s advisee, Jack Byrnes, about such an early, momentous victory. 

“How does it feel to be a winner?”

“It felt good.” Riveting. 

Event 2: The Spelling Bee

“The only victory that counts is the one that’s won by the right means.” – Theodore Roosevelt

What could be more exciting than watching a disorderly cluster of people line up and spell into a microphone? Perhaps a few things, but this year’s Spelling Bee certainly sparked engagement, more so than usual. The final three: one senior, one junior advisor, one sophomore—this was the moment—the battle that would either solidify the juniors as top contenders or put the sophomores and seniors on the board. Bathed in the hot crimson gaze of the audience’s scrutiny and protests, three brave contestants spelled, then spelled some more, until finally one stood alone. Congratulations to the sophomores for winning with the extraordinarily difficult word “souvenir.”  

Event 2: Musical Chairs

“The harder the conflict, the greater the triumph.” – Thomas Paine

Cambridge Dictionary defines “fighting spirit” as “the willingness to compete and do things that are difficult,” often for the sake of victory. Typically applicable to intense competition, this phrase describes the unyielding, the relentless, and triumphant…and musical chairs contestants. Each entering with strategy and agenda, the two dozen or so high school students stood on the reflective gymnasium floor with nothing but the promise of valor to fuel them. Challenges, competition—not even rules could keep these contestants from that sweet victory of claiming he final chair. 

Fumbles, collisions, acrobatics, displays of pure, raw athleticism—one would never think to associate such verbiage with a kindergarten-level game, and yet here we are. It is fascinating to see how the Friends Academy student body can turn even the simplest of games into an occasion akin to an Olympic sport. Some try and some who cheat, and best believe this event saw it all.

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In the absolute showdown, the underclassman battled head-to-head to secure the win, though the sophomores took the final chair, granting them their second win thus far. Despite the triumphant victory by the underclassman, musical chairs as a clash of clashes will see no further days, for the extreme competition produced by walking around a circle of chairs proved too physical for the Quaker tenets of Friends Academy. 

Event 3 – Name that Tune

“Victory is like music to my ears” – Jared Williams

What melody is sweeter than that of victory? There is none, at least, not for those brave enough to find their way to the mic and compete in this recently installed clash event.   

Last year, I confidently stated that I would win this event this year. That was an idiotic statement, for I fear it set me up to fail the minute I stepped on the stage. As the rounds progressed, so did the difficulty of the songs. Fighting valiantly, my partner and I made it far, but the true winners were not us, but our fellow juniors. 

Regardless of personal blunders, the juniors took home their second win by correctly guessing “No. 1 Party Anthem” by the Arctic Monkeys, followed closely by the seniors, who secured a respectable second place. 

Event 4: Trivia

“It is not enough that I succeed – everyone else must fail.” – Julius Caesar

Mr. Hayes would certainly agree, for he and his team of seniors won in what I can only refer to as a beyond-impressive display of knowledge, strategy, and pure grit. It was not enough to simply win—this group of seniors entered the theater with one initiative: pulverize the competition. 

There is no final-round elimination in the Friends Academy Trivia format, and yet, miraculously, Mr. Hayes made it happen, shattering any fantasies of triumph for the three other teams. Winning with a total of nine correct answers, the nameless group of upperclassmen dominated the competition, bringing home the maximum points for the final live event of Clash of Classes.

Pseudo-Events: Food 4 Food & Sustainability

Come March, the community helpers, WATCH, conduct an annual can and food drive in which the grade with the most donations receives Class of Clash Points. This is typically the only non-live event of the clash, however, Sustainability provided another chance for grades to rack up points in the form of a digital challenge. 

Winners and Closing

At 10:29 AM, community time, SFB alerted all of the triumphant victory of the junior class and our consequential reward of a pizza party and dress-down day—grand prizes indeed. Below are the final standings:

9th: 150 points

10th: 722 points

11th: 1,134 points

12th: 1,002 points

Communities need unity, yes, but they also need division. This division presents itself annually in events like these, where we are pitted against each other—sure—but pitted against each other to forge stronger bonds. Ultimately, Clash of Classes is integral to Friends Academy, for it provides a moment where the high school can come together and cheer on their peers, yell at the game-runners, and argue with the judges, and while not all positive things, they bring the community together in a strange, roundabout way.